Mother and Mario
Written by Herb Reagan
March, 2003
It has taken many years and the added understanding and wisdom that seems to be a part of the golden years to help me understand why my Mother, Ellen Ware Reagan, gave up what seemed to be a comfortable life in Riverside, a lovely upscale suburb of Chicago where she had lived most of her life. Mother had married Joseph Goddard when she was about 23. In the next ten years she had five children. Mr Goddard died suddenly in 1916. It was most overwhelming to face the tragedy of his death, while facing the responsibility of five young children. In 1918 she married Mr. Herbert Reagan, a widower, also with five children of roughly the same ages as hers. This appeared to be the perfect solution to both of them for their unfortunate circumstances. I was first born of this marriage in 1919 and my brother came along in 1921. Tragedy struck again in 1923 when my Father passed away. This, then was her situation at that time. Twice widowed by age 41 with the responsibility for twelve underage children and a rather modest bank account. The future must have seemed very depressing to her. Her future had to have appeared no future in terms of a loving companionship with someone!
In 1927 Mother was invited to be a traveling companion to an older woman in Riverside. She had no one in her family to go with her and it seemed a nice idea to invite Mother to go to Europe with her While Mother was hesitant, the idea of a month or so away was very enticing. It turned out that Mother was right to hesitate . The woman she went with was very difficult to travel with and apparently very demanding. Mother found ways to get away from her and be by herself to escape the turmoil
When they were in Rome they stayed at one of the fancier hotels where a formal tea was offered each afternoon. A string quartet played and the handsome man playing the cello was Mario Saint-Cyr. Mother was there to escape her boredom,.and somehow over the course of a few days they met. Neither one spoke the others language, but it didn't seem to matter. It was love at first sight and somehow in the few days they had together. they knew this was real. They agreed to write to each other until some day, some way, they could marry At the time, Mario was a 34 year old bachelor and Mother was 45. As far as I know, the age difference was never considered a problem!.
During the next five years Mother and Mario wrote regularly to one another, translating each others letters with English-Italian dictionaries. As far as I know, she kept the "romance" completely secret. During that time one daughter eloped, three others were married in large weddings, Father's oldest son, Arch, took off on his own to find himself. One daughter was now a nurse living in Boston, two boys were away in college and one girl was at a boarding school in Virginia. That left my sister Barbara, who had recovered from a two year illness; Ben, age 10, and me, age 12, the only occupants of the 21 room Victorian house, where we had all grown up, awash in extra room. It was now time for Mother to execute the plan she had had in mind for these five years.
Her plan was to turn the house over to three of the daughters and their husbands to turn into three apartments. This was 1931. The depression was growing worse by the day and this was an attractive solution for them. It was also the solution Mother was looking for, She booked passage on the Cunard Line Aquatania, a ship about the same size and appearance as the famous Titanic. Mother, Barbara, Ben and I would tour the Mediterranean for about ten days and then leave the ship in Naples and take the train to Rome. We settled into an apartment in Rome April, 1932. I don't remember understanding why we were there. I guess I was just too young to question the wisdom of this major life change.
Of course we met Mario soon after we arrived. He spoke very little English. We spoke no Italian. He had no experience with young people. We knew no musicians. Needless to say, it was a non-event. The general result was that Mother and Mario had plenty of time to themselves to become re-aquainted. I'm sure they appreciated this. That summer we went to Paris and stayed in an apartment. Lester and Jaque (more sibs) spent their school vacations with us. I'm sure these three months was for Mother to consider whether she really wanted to marry again. Her decision was "yes," and they were married in October 1932, in Rome.
employment for Mario. It was pretty much a losing battle right from the start. He spoke very poor English, even though he was getting better at it as time went on. But what he had to offer that didn't require the language skills was his capability with the cello. He practiced every day for an hour or two, and even to my unpracticed ears, he was a good musician. Unfortunately, this was the depths of the great depression. Musicians did not have much priority in federal help programs. He wasn't a citizen and most musicians in major orchestras were Union members. His opportunities were virtually nil.
During this time Mario had a brochure printed up to mail or present to potential employers We were fortunate to find a copy of it which had been in Caroline Saunder's memory collection. It gives a good picture of his experience from prior days in Europe.
The Fascist regime was at its peak in Italy at this time. Mario was resistant to these politics, and as is the case in most dictatorships, means are always available to make it difficult for the dissenters. Mario felt the pressure rising daily, and when he was let go from a long term job as the music critic for the main newspaper in Rome, he was stripped of any means of making a living in Italy. In 1935 they decided to move to America. The winds of war in Europe were beginning to be felt by those who could interpret them. Since Mario was leaving two sisters behind he felt the need to leave without raising any suspicions. Their departure was made without any good-byes to longtime friends.
For the next eight years Mother and Mario lived somewhat of a gypsy kind of life. They drove all over the US, staying wherever it suited them at the time. A lot of this travel was associated with trying to find
Mario's forte in his own language was poetry. And writing. By 1940, 5 years after he came to the States, he wrote the following poem for Caroline on her birthday.
About the same time he composed a little musical piece in celebration of her marriage:
A major tragedy in Mario's life was that he was afflicted with Epilepsy. No one in the family (except Mother) was aware of this until it came out rather accidentally in 1938. He only had seizures at night in his sleep, usually, and only at intervals of about 60 days. Once in a while he would have a mild seizure during the day. Just resting for a while was all that was needed. In today's world with good medical control it would hardly be worth mentioning. In the 1930's it was considered a form of insanity. It was a terrible label to hang on any one; and of course, gave us all cause to worry.
Mother and Mario spent just about every summer at the cottage at Pointe Aux Peaux on Lake Erie. This was a summer cottage that was inherited by the Goddard children when their father died. He had inherited it from his parents. During the winter they would usually find some place to stay in the South or the Southwest. They also visited with members of our far-flung family. Mother's friends would often offer them a home for a temporary stay while they were gone.
In 1942, when they were at the lake, Mario would go out in the water in front of the cottage for a swim about every afternoon. One afternoon Mother realized that she hadn't seen him for some time and she and Liz started looking for him. Liz found him floating face down in the water. She pulled him ashore and tried to revive him, to no avail. She later said there didn't seem to be any water in his lungs. The assumption is that he had a seizure and couldn't make it out of the water in time. Mario is buried in the Goddard family plot at Bronzewood Cemetery in Hinsdale,
As I look back in memory, I'm truly convinced that, in spite of the difficulties they faced, Mother and Mario were truly in love.
Addendum, April 2003
Since adding this article to the web site we have come up with a copy of a children's book that Mario and Liz Field (then Liz Silverthorne) published and sold in Rome for a year or two before they left for the U.S. It is the children's story, "The Three Little Pigs." Mario told the story in verse, while Liz did the illustrations. Liz said it sold well and she received royalties for a while after she returned to America. No one pushed the sales after Mother and Mario left Italy.
